Sunday, May 10, 2009

Have It Your Way

Life is nothing but a continous chain of choices. Each link represents a decision you have made....some are strong and some are weak.

My husband (the "A"......could stand for athetist or asshole....both said with a deep affection) asked the other night "if God knew He would have to send Jesus to die for man's sins, why put THE TREE in THE GARDEN?" My answer was, of course, free will. Servitude out of choice is more desirable than a mandate to serve. I asked him which gave more coming home and spontaneously saying "I Love You", or him saying to me "Delores I Love You", and me going "yeah I love you too". One I elected to say; the other was more like an automated response.

Some choices are a no brainer......or rather should be. I don't have to eat slop to know that it tastes bad. I don't have to smoke crack to know it is addictive. I don't have to bathe in the sewer to know that I'll stink. And I DO NOT have to read my husband's blogspot to know that it is full of crap.

Sometimes we make choices and then want to blame others. Scenario: City workers have blocked off a portion of a road due to numerous pot holes. The sign says "Detour...Road in bad repair. You will not like traveling this road". But we (and only God knows why) go around the sign and speed down the road. bump,bump,bump...there goes the alignment, oops there goes the oil pan....... When we come out the other side the worse for the wear, we call the mayor and complain about that Horrible road we just traveled on and how bad it made us feel. We tell him we just cannot believe that he would allow those kind of roads in this city. ARE WE STUPID??? The warning was there. We were forwarned that the road was not fit for travel. But it was our decision to go around that warning and speed on down. Then we had the nerve to want to complain to the owner of the road about its bad condition. Why did we not heed the sign? Are we like the dog that returns to its vomit?? Are we FOOLS?

We have to be careful of choices. The decisions sowed will reflect upon the harvest reaped. I think many of us would undo some of the options we picked. We would agree with Robert Frost:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood............

Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

"Yet knowing how way leads on to way".....a chain of choices that all link together. Oh, You will have it your way.......just make sure you want that harvest.


Dane Eidson said...

Hey Honey! This is your loving husband of 33 years and for the next billion zillion zillion ceuturies. You for got a major credit in your post. You counted out the power of God! Hey, how does it feel to have God prove us both wrong? Anyways, I love you very much. Thank you for your prayers. Isn't it great to have a born again blood bought Christian husband?! Just when you think all is comes the hero in the white cowboy hat and rescues the the day!

Dane Eidson said...

Now pray that God will help me spell correctly, type well, and in correct grammar.
BTW, you are so sexy. I know you lead me on on purpose. Why do you get me all excited? And how does the ladies keep the towel from falling off their hips.
Verse for the Day:
Dane 11:12-14, "I called unto thee and thou hidst from me. Yea, thou said unto me, I hidest from thee for I am naked and I shiver in the cold. I feared thee. For I knewest that if thou sawest me thou wouldest never leavest me alone and I wouldest not be able to rest in thine garden."

Dane Eidson said...

Dane 12:12-22
"Yea, nay, nay, but yea, and couldest be, but I am not surest, but yea, nay, yea. I rose up in the middle of the nightest. For I was awaken by the terrible rumbles of my lord. Yea, I ranest for cover. For I knewest that the rumbles were from the holy wrath of the chili beans my lord did eateth. Then the odor of my lord's rumblings overtookest me. Then I had a vision. I saw many throwing thick blankets over their faces and crying out, 'Hide us from the terrible odor of him that shooteth out the dark dense clouds of the digested holy chili. For we are afraid.' Then I sawest the nasal hairs of the afflicted burn up in flames and their noses jumpeth off their faces in a futile attemptest to hidest from the terrible dense methane clouds of my lord's digested chili. Then I awokest. I tookest a mop handle and hittest my lord over his headest. I yelled unto him, 'Thou hast died and rottest up in thine bowels. Takest thine asseth outsideth noweth. And I the Apostle Delores say,Even so, my lord Dane, getteth outsideth quickest when thou want to fartest. Amen and Amen!'

Dane Eidson said...

Dane 14:14-24.000001014 "Yea my dear lord Daneth. I knowest that thou are swabbest and deboneairest.To who elseth shall I turn to if I wantest a sexy studdest but to thee? I the Apostline Delores Eidson, testify unto all women of the whole world, that my husaband Dane Eidson is a sexy studdeth and all thee are envious of me. Yea, I knowest that mine husband IQ is as greatest as his manhoodest. For if the whole world were a scale the Earth wouldest be a subatomic particle as the happy quarks when compared unto mine husband's manhood. For the female masses say, Low his manhood is here. Low his manhood is there. Low Dane's manhood is everywhere for it is truly that awesome. And I the Apostline Delores Eidson testify that this is true. For I say, OOOOOaaaaahhhhwooowww!"

Dane Eidson said...

Dane 25:0.000009-1.999901 "To whom shall I compare the sexy looks of mine husband? Yea, GQ magazine can not doest my husband's sexiness any justice. For it was upon the Lord's day decades agoest when I firstest sawest my husband I trembled is pure excatasy. I fell before his feet and said, "Oh will thou coverest thine head and body? For I am overwhelmed by thine sexiness and thy maiden canst not bearest even the smallest particle of thine good looks. Then I tookest a large wooden bat and beatest off the massive crowd of the females and screamed, Dane is mine! He is mine! I sawest him firsteth! Then I begged and fasted for 120 days pleading with Dane to marry me. And I wept much for I knewest no woman was worthy of him. But Dane had mercy and married me. And I prayed for the divine strength to look upon my husband in all his sexiness for I knewest in mine own power I wouldest have melted in his sexy presnece. I the Apostline Delores Eidson testify this tale is true. Even so you women canst have him. He is mine forever!"

Dane Eidson said...

Delores Eidson is the most awesome LADY in the world! Devils run from her, men want her, and she is all mine!!!! HA HA HA! (of course God loves her more and it is because of HIM my wife is wonderful!)

Anonymous said...

Delores the A is definitely for ASSHOLE as many good people on carm would agree with :)